沒有錢我們還能愛多久

                        發布時間:2019-04-26 01:29 作者:admin 瀏覽數:

                          

                          我的女友很優秀,很出色,她的優秀讓我對所有感情的誘惑都不屑一顧。我們深深地傾情于對方,在校園那段美麗而又浪漫的日子里,我們身邊全是羨慕的眼光。曾有一個喜歡我的女孩兒氣呼呼地說我們的愛不會永遠,女友沖她做了個鬼臉,說我們是最幸福的一對。

                          在學校的時光開心而又瀟灑,幾乎每一次我們都是手挽著手一起去上晚自習,無論再冷再熱的天氣我們都會換著時間在對方宿舍樓下等待。下雪的時候她為了我去學織手套,結果手都扎破了,為這我心疼了好多天。我們一起去食堂打飯,一起看電影、逛街,所有能在一起的時間我們都沒有錯過。我很喜歡我去打籃球她在旁邊拎著衣服為我加油的樣子,我很懷念她坐在我的舊單車后面輕輕依偎的感覺,我為她偷過花園里的玫瑰,為她和別人比賽爬高,結果摔下來頭都破了……那些日子,是我一生中最幸福的時光。

                          畢業后,我們為了能在一起,和各自的家人都鬧翻了,他們說我們不會幸福,可那些話根本無濟于事,沒人能攔住我們。

                          然而,我們從搬進租來房子的第一天起,就默不作聲地坐了半天,因為我們第一次知道了什么都沒有的滋味。她的父母是機關干部,她是他們唯一的女兒;我的家人做生意,我也是獨子,衣來伸手、飯來張口的待遇一去不復返,好在我們是真心相愛的,于是我們相視著笑了,拍拍手,開始了新的生活。

                          社會給我們上了生動的一課。我們真正知道了有學歷找工作也并非那么容易,從起初的高不成低不就漸漸變成能掙錢的都干,這期間體會了生活的艱辛,領教了現實的殘酷,然而我們很開心,因為我們能在一起。第一個月發工資我給她買了條圍巾,買了份烤鴨和餃子,她卻哭了,像個委屈的孩子在我懷里泣不成聲,我的心酸透了,那一刻,我很難過。

                          在寒冬的夜里,我們圍著電暖器取暖,她趴在我的肩頭,那種眼神讓我很難過,我伏在她耳邊說一定要讓她過上好日子,我們一定會像從前那樣讓人羨慕的。她說能相愛已經是很幸福的事情了,我們還奢求什么呢?只要你能留在我的身邊,只要我們永遠都能這樣相偎著互相取暖,只要你發工資還能記得給我買烤鴨和餃子,我就是世上最幸福的女人,那些有錢人未必會像我們這樣相親相愛,記住,我們是最幸福的一對,無論發生什么事情你都不要離開我!她的話讓我心頭一熱,緊緊地擁住她,我不敢讓她看到我的眼淚,因為她喜歡堅強的男孩兒。我在心里一遍一遍告訴自己要努力,那晚我們再次海誓山盟,那晚我們幻想未來,那晚我們相約一輩子不離不棄。

                          我想我們的愛夠轟轟烈烈了,我們的情足以讓天地動容了。可就在那晚,房東太太來催我們交房租,看到我們如此幸福,她很感動,但她眼中更多的是同情和懷疑。我們每次感到窮困的時候都會情不自禁地說起在學校的浪漫時光,那時我們不開心的時候只需在校園迷人的小路上拉著手走一段就沒事了,那年的圣誕夜我跑遍了所有的精品屋才找到她喜愛已久的八音盒,那時她最愛給我講王子與公主的故事。

                          可是現在,我能夠給她的幸福只是在發工資時才舍得買的一份烤鴨和餃子。盡管生活慢慢地好了起來,但這種所謂的進步只是相對于以前的寒酸。我們漸漸有了穩定的工作,也攢了一些錢,但從那時開始我們談的更多的是買房子,我們幻想著有一天能有自己漂亮的私家車,她說她給我看中了一套皮爾·卡丹西服,她想把我打造成一個完美男人。

                          可我知道,每次路過美容店的時候她都很憂傷,當我看到她那美麗的容顏因缺少保養而有些黯淡的時候,我頓時覺得自己在這個社會里十分渺小,慚愧得只能苦笑!于是那天我花了六百元錢給她買了些美容用品,她高興得像個孩子般又蹦又跳,此情此景,我唯一能做的也許只能是長嘆一口氣吧!

                          我去過她就職的那家廣告公司,那些不漂亮的女人們挎著意大利真皮皮包,穿著上千元的套裝。我也去過她同事的家,那些漂亮房子里有著超大屏幕的液晶電視,有著可以將整個人都埋進去的舒適沙發,有浪漫的燈光,有紅酒,甚至養著名貴的狗。女主人在炫耀著她的名牌鞋子、昂貴首飾,這一切,只是因為她們找了個有錢的老公。面對滿屋子的奢華,我低下了頭。

                          她們正談論著一部最新引進的大片,而我卻想到了女友在菜市場為了一毛兩毛錢和人討價還價的模樣,別人說這么漂亮的女孩兒還這么小氣時她難堪的表情;記得有天她偷偷對著鏡子流淚,因為她那纖細而又嬌嫩的手因洗衣而變得粗糙,因為……我不知道能夠列舉出多少因為,但我知道,這一切,只因為我們還沒有能夠過上像在家里那樣的生活,因為我們沒有錢;記起擠公交車的尷尬;記起她委屈而又不敢外露的神情。我看了女友一眼,她難過得快要哭了,過了一會兒她提出有事先告辭,我知道她是為我著想,我也清晰地記得,那一晚,我們都失眠了。

                          從此她成了幸福但不快樂的女孩兒,她像我一樣拼命地工作,打拼在這個現實的社會里,每天下班都是一身一心的疲憊。望著她曾經天真單純而今寫滿倦意的臉龐,望著她為了不讓我難過而自強微笑的表情,我的心碎了。

                          于是我拼命地掙錢,像牛一樣勤耕不輟,拉著我們的感情前行。我們的事業是有希望的,因為我們有才華,因為我們很努力,但成功卻是一個漫長的過程。雖然生活過得好了一些,但在我們生活的那個圈子,我們依舊是貧下中農。迫于壓力,我偷偷地學會了喝酒、抽煙。

                          在兩年七個月零十三天的那個晚上,她走了,留下一封讓我心碎而又無奈的信,她說:“寶貝兒,我很愛你,你知道的,我很愛你!為了你,我可以什么都不顧,為了你,我可以毫不猶豫地犧牲自己,你是我的一切,是我的幸福,可正是因為這份愛才讓我決定離開你,我將所有的眼淚都留在了這間屋子里,我將所有的情誼都刻在了心里,可我不忍再看你為了讓我過得好一點而不要命地工作,我不忍再看你在壓力下日漸消瘦,你知道嗎?

                          ”我很無奈,我們都很無奈,因為我不知道,沒有錢,我們能愛多久?當初,為了你我留了下來,如今,為了你我要離開,我的背包里裝滿了讓人心醉的回憶,也許有一天我還會回來,因為我愛你,沒有你,我的生命便沒有色彩,可是現在讓我走吧,那樣你會輕松一點,我們都會輕松一點,好嗎?照顧好自己……“

                          ”是啊!沒有錢,我們能愛多久?“她走后,我反復地吟念這句讓人心酸的臺詞,眼淚再次無聲地滑落……

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